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The Epic, Awesome and Sad Meltdown of Charlie Sheen


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WINNING TIGER BLOOD ADONIS VATICAN WARLOCK LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

 

holy shit, i thought chuck norris jokes aged poorly. this has been what, almost a month? already sounds like Dr Evil jokes in '06.

Jesus fucking Sheen, man. You fuck off the board for a while only to come back and poor haterade on Sheen Nation? You and Baytor are sharing that pod nicely.

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So its been bugging me... ever since this whole Charlie Sheen Goes Ape-Shit Fest began I couldn't help but think of him reminding me of someone. Every time I heard "WINNING" or any of his other dumbass catchphrases there was a tick in my head that said "geez this sounds familiar" without knowing exactly who it sounded like... until just now:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

charlie-sheen-mental-health.jpgBrucieKibbutz-GTAIV.jpg

ALPHA BABY

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So its been bugging me... ever since this whole Charlie Sheen Goes Ape-Shit Fest began I couldn't help but think of him reminding me of someone. Every time I heard "WINNING" or any of his other dumbass catchphrases there was a tick in my head that said "geez this sounds familiar" without knowing exactly who it sounded like... until just now:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

charlie-sheen-mental-health.jpgBrucieKibbutz-GTAIV.jpg

ALPHA BABY

 

So does that mean that Mori is Joe or Emilio?

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Ma-Sheen on Tour! Click for "Torpedo of Truth" Tour Dates

 

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Unfortunately (or predictably?) his first show in Detroit wasn't well received at all . . .

 

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. . . Sheen, known for his wild partying and rampant drug use, said he thought Detroit would be a good place to tell some stories about crack cocaine. The remark prompted loud, immediate boos. At another point, Sheen showed a short film he wrote, directed and produced years ago called "RPG." He sat in the front row to watch the flick, which starred a much younger Johnny Depp. Again, more boos.

 

The show actually started off with a bang.

 

After a video montage of movie clips — Sheen in "Wall Street" and "Platoon" set to a guitar solo from Sheen friend Rob Patterson — the star emerged to raucous applause and a standing ovation. The cheering increased as the women he calls his "goddesses" took the stage.

 

The two women, a former porn star and an actress who live with him, carried placards with the words "War" and "Lock," a reference to Sheen's recent description of himself.

 

When the goddesses locked lips in front of him, Sheen smirked. He had the crowd in the palm of his hand.

 

 

 

"I don't see a single empty seat," he said.

 

That quickly changed.

 

As the showed bogged down, an audience member booed, prompting Sheen to reply, "I've already got your money, dude."

 

Things only got worse.

 

"Tonight's an experiment," he said.

 

For some, it was an expensive experiment. . . .

 

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+1

 

And unlike Haku's, I actually gave the post a +1 :2T:

I'm too busy +1-ing my own awesome posts to give actual +1s to anyone else. :2T:

 

Besides, a written +1 from me > an actual +1 from anyone else. Trufax.

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  • 2 months later...
  • 2 months later...

this is what the bottom looks like

 

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The Insane Clown Posse never thought they'd be able to get a star as big as Charlie Sheen to M.C. at their upcoming Gathering of the Juggalos festival ... until Sheen himself ASKED for the job.

 

ICP member Violent J tells TMZ ... the group received a call from Charlie's rep back in April ... telling them how Sheen was a HUGE fan of the Gathering and he would LOVE to work with the group.

 

Of course, ICP was STOKED -- but figured Sheen was WAYYYYY out of their price range. But, Violent J says Charlie was "so into the message of the festival" ... they were able to agree on a "reasonable amount."

 

The deal was finalized last week and Sheen will serve as an M.C. at the event in August.

 

Dude better be careful though ... TWO celebrity guests -- Tila Tequila and Method Man -- were bloodied up on stage at last year's Gathering ... when the fans pelted them with rocks and beer cans.

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Heh. In news of irony, Sheen's replacement on 2.5 Men may end up going to jail before Ma-sheen. Winning?

 

Feds Say Ashton Kutcher Could Be in Trouble

Ashton Kutcher's editorship of Details was, as we noted yesterday, a brazenly self interested and highly misleading act of journalism. But it may have been a federal crime, too, judging from what the New York Times is reporting.

 

"It's certainly a possibility that a case like this could be investigated," assistant Federal Trade Commission director Richard Cleland tells the Times of Kutcher's Details special online issue, in which eight of 12 recommended products in one article were Kutcher investments. "If you're out there promoting individual products that you have a specific investment in, it needs to be disclosed... If you have a significant economic investment that is not otherwise apparent, that may potentially affect the credibility of your endorsement, and I see that as a potential problem." The FTC has made a priority out of online conflicts of interest.

 

It's also possible Kutcher violated SEC rules. . .

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  • 7 months later...

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