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Ask Crimsonfire Things About Ireland


crimsonfire

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Have you ever seen a real life black person there? Like, walking around and stuff?

 

Are you serious?? Where I work I see more blacks, Chinese and Polish than Irish people.

 

They were banished to whence they came by local politicians. Sorta.

 

http://www.independe...uo-2941395.html

 

Ugh don't get me started. Irish people fucking irritate me when we all fall over one another to cry "Racist, racist, ooh look at the awful racist." Everyone is just dying to be seen as ever so enlightened and culturally mature. The guy could've been a bit more tactful about it but he was just saying what we were all thinking to be fair.

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Is Ireland really made of cheese?

 

Does the blarney stone just reek of urine at this point?

 

Would one strategically introduced breeding pair of snakes just wreck shit up for everyone?

 

Why does Ireland's flag look so much like France's flag?

 

How many different types of Irish accents are there?

 

Do the real Irish just hate the fuck out of their American counterparts as much as the Italians do?

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Is Ireland really made of cheese? No but it should be.

 

Does the blarney stone just reek of urine at this point? It reeked of urine long before it became a tourist attraction as it was a urinal for the British troops garrisoned there many moons ago.

 

Would one strategically introduced breeding pair of snakes just wreck shit up for everyone? We'd just invoke Mecha-St. Patrick and he'd take care of bidness.

 

Why does Ireland's flag look so much like France's flag? Ours is different colours and doesn't smell of arrogance and garlic.

 

How many different types of Irish accents are there? I've counted about 7 in Dublin alone so far...

 

Do the real Irish just hate the fuck out of their American counterparts as much as the Italians do? We make no secret that we love the shit out of Irish-Americans, it's just fun to pretend we know their cousins. My mother is named after JFKs sister for fuck sake.

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Crimsonfire. Definitely not racist.

 

father-ted-racist1.jpg

 

are_you_right_there_father_ted.jpg

 

The fuck are you on about? I'm totally a racist along with the other 90% of the country who are just too pussy to face up to it. We've been a multicultural country for what like ten years? People don't get used to that kind of thing in a wet afternoon. I'm not forming a lynch mob or anything but I do have a lot of prejudices and preconceptions. It takes time to properly integrate different cultures. I make no apologies.

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Do you know this guy?

 

 

No but I know the show he's from. Hardy Bucks. Check it out on YouTube if you want a 100% accurate portrayal of rural Ireland (no, really).

 

I'm sure you'll come along in 10-15 years. America certainly has.

 

That was so subtle I don't even know if it was at my expense or not.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Have you ever seen a real life black person there? Like, walking around and stuff?

 

True story, I was able to count on three fingers the amount of non white (not even black) people I had ever seen up until the age of 14. First when I was 7, broke my arm and was treated by an Indian doctor, second and third were a black woman and her son who were invited to the same birthday party I was. At this party all the kids proceeded to touch his hair and tell him how "cool" it was.

 

Also when deciding who to "pick" in games, I used to use the rhyme:

eenie meenie miny moe,

catch a nigger by the toe,

if he squeels, let him go,

eenie meenie miny moe.

 

As the lesser popular version switched nigger with tiger, I (for a scarely long time) thought a nigger was a large cat.

 

I swear to God none of this is made up.

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I never heard the word "nigger" said out loud by an actual person until I moved to Texas. That shit changed real quick.

 

Fun story: when I was in highschool, there was a class in the library quietly studying or something. One of the kids was sitting next to a black girl and he randomly starts rhythmically knocking the bottom of the table. He leans over and asks her

"you know what that is?"

"it's your grandfather swingin' against a tree"

 

And then he bursts into maniacal laughter. He was suspended, but it was probably for being disruptive in the library.

 

Ahhhh, Texas.

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What is with the whole Irish language? I mean everyone makes fun of Wales for their fucked-up language, but you guys have one just like it right?

 

I ask because I was looking through Rosetta Stones library and they had Irish up as a language you could learn, and I thought "Irish??" I thought that was just British with a different accent. How many people still talk "Irish?"

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