soldier of fortune Posted August 26, 2002 Share Posted August 26, 2002 Moe: For the last time, when i tell you to put your beer on a coaster you'll do it!!! Hanz Moleman: You call that a knife? This is a knife oh there i go!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soldier of fortune Posted August 26, 2002 Share Posted August 26, 2002 Dr. Hibberd: We're now going to inject a Radioactive dye so we can see his circulatory system. Nurse: But Doctor i haven't injected the dye yet!! Dr Hibberd: Good lord Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reverend Jax Posted August 27, 2002 Share Posted August 27, 2002 Sushi Resturant waiter: May I have your order? Homer: Oh, it all looks so horrible. I'll just have one of thoses, and one of those, and one of those, and two of those, and thre of those.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soldier of fortune Posted September 12, 2002 Share Posted September 12, 2002 Homer: "When i see their smiles, i know they're going to jab me with something!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted September 12, 2002 Share Posted September 12, 2002 Willy: Yeah, I bought your mutt...and I 'ate 'im! ::Bart is shocked:: Willy: I 'ate 'is little face, I 'ate 'is guts, and I 'ate the way 'e's always barkin'! So I gave 'im to the church. Bart: Ohhh, I see... you HATE him, so you gave him to the church. Willy: Aye. I also 'ate the mess he left on me rug. ::Bart is shocked again:: Willy: Ya heard me! Wiggum: All right, you scrawny beanpoles: becoming a cop is _not_ something that happens overnight. It takes one solid weekend of training to get that badge. Trainee: Forget about the badge! When do we get the freakin' guns?! Wiggum: Hey, I told you, you don't get your gun until you tell me your name. Trainee: I've have it up to here with your "rules"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted September 12, 2002 Share Posted September 12, 2002 Dr. Nick (singing while in surgery): The kneebone's connect to the...something. The something'd connected to the...red thing. The red thing's connected to my wrist watch...uhoh. Lisa: Dad, we did something terrible! Homer: Did you wreck the car? Bart: No. Homer: Did you raise the dead? Lisa: Yes. Homer: But the cars ok? Lisa and Bart: Uh-huh Homer: Alright, then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 26, 2002 Share Posted September 26, 2002 "Shoplifting!? Havent you learned anything from thet guy with the sermons every Sunday...Captain whatshisname?! There are rules in this society! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy films? For fun? Did you hear anyone laughing?! Well, except at the guy with those funny noises...beep! honk honk! a-wooga! ...where was I? Oh, yeah - Stay outta my booze!" - Homer lecturing Bart Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soldier of fortune Posted September 27, 2002 Share Posted September 27, 2002 Homer: "To Alcohol, the cause, and the solution to all lifes problems!!" :sly: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spongebob Posted October 2, 2002 Share Posted October 2, 2002 Lisa:Dad you cant drive he has your license. Homer:Well I can try. (puts key in ignation) Homer: Wohoo! It worked Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spongebob Posted October 2, 2002 Share Posted October 2, 2002 No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. No beer, No T.V. make Homer go crazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus_was_Goth Posted October 5, 2002 Share Posted October 5, 2002 Well, my signature is a damn good one. but of course there's: "Look at me! Im a puffy pink cloud!"---Homer drunk in a cotton candy machine "Marge whats wrong? Are you hungry? Sleepy? Gassy? Gassy? Is it gas? It's gas isin't it?" Homer to marge on the airplane. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 (edited) boogie had a thread where you had to guess the episode the quote posted came from, i could'nt find it so i'm postin' here. "Oh, they have the internet on computers now." p.s. i recommend one of the mods find boogie's thread and merge it with this Edited January 7, 2008 by alive she cried Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycaon Posted January 8, 2008 Share Posted January 8, 2008 That thread was in another forum. http://www.hondosbar.com/forum/index.php?s...amp;hl=simpsons Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acalis Posted January 8, 2008 Author Share Posted January 8, 2008 Moe: "Hey, hey! If you're gonna beat up my friend inside my bar, that's a two-drink minimum." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crimsonfire Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Lisa: "Relax? I cant relax! Nor can I yield, relent or...only two synonyms? Oh my god Im losing my perspicacity! Agggghhhhh!!!" Homer: "Its always in the last place you left it" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acalis Posted January 10, 2008 Author Share Posted January 10, 2008 Lady: "Mr. Simpson, why would you like to become a Big Brother?" Homer's Brain: "Don't say revenge... don't say revenge." Homer: "Uhh, revenge?" Homer's Brain: "That's it, I'm getting outta here! *footsteps then slamming door*" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the division of joy Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 The two best lines came from "The Island" episode. "I want answers now, or i want answers eventually!!" and "Shut up, thats why" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acalis Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 Grandpa: "My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he IS NOT a pornstar!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted April 6, 2008 Share Posted April 6, 2008 (edited) moe: if you're so busy telling us what it ain't how about telling us what it am Edited April 7, 2008 by alive she cried Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jables Posted April 7, 2008 Share Posted April 7, 2008 My favourite Simpsons line is You look like you can suck a mean dick. Turnsies! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Megz Posted April 7, 2008 Share Posted April 7, 2008 After Homer has a lobster as a pet and kills it by giving it a hot bath. Homer: Pinchy would have wanted it this way.. (sob sob) pass the butter and liza goes to the Crazy Cat lady's house for her kids TV show Liza: Some people say she's crazy just because she owns a couple of cats Crazy cat lady comes out throwing cats and screaming Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted April 7, 2008 Share Posted April 7, 2008 oh, god, i loved the repeated effect of crazy cat lady that episode. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Megz Posted April 7, 2008 Share Posted April 7, 2008 oh, god, i loved the repeated effect of crazy cat lady that episode. She is by far my favourite.. in fact she's my screen-saver Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amynicole Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 i thought it was hilarious in the movie when everone from the bar ran to the church and everyone from the church ran to the bar. that is so human nature. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thelogan Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Attorney: "You, sir, are a moron!" Homer: "A mormon? But I'm from EARTH." and another Mr. Burns: "This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election, and yet if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you." Smithers: "You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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