The NZA Posted September 26, 2003 Author Share Posted September 26, 2003 Because "Princess Time" was brought to you by the same culture that invented cousin' fuzzin, mayo sandwhiches & Pap's Blue Ribbon beer: Double-wide culture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ganny McVagflaps Posted September 26, 2003 Share Posted September 26, 2003 How long should I wait until I put the phat moves on the hottie that I work with? "I like your accent" "Heh...they always do" B) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted September 27, 2003 Share Posted September 27, 2003 1) if you get caught picking your nose...what is the best way to cover your ass? 2) how come you can be blunt with your co-workers, but if you are blunt to your boss...you're 'disrespectful'...didnt know boss meant above straight forwardness 3) what is the best way to basically say 'you are so fucking dumb' and seem like you are building their character? oh and 1 more thing... 4) if you are in a quiet room full of ppl, and you look up and say... "PORK!" and go back to what you were doing...why is it that everytime that happens, ppl fall out of their seats cracking up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 27, 2003 Author Share Posted September 27, 2003 This depends on your location. If its a department store, you simply need a Zak/AC Slater type plan to take over the sound sytem with Luther Vandross. If its an adult vid store, just whip it out, man. Wait, she likes a jersey accent? I'm fairly certain there's laws against taking advantage of those kind of women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 27, 2003 Author Share Posted September 27, 2003 1) You can always pretend you were scratching the side of your nose...but chances are, youre busted. Bite the bullet; wipe the magic nose goblin on the nosy onlooker whilst headbutting them. It's over the top, and you might get in trouble, but they'll damn well mind their business next time. 2) Your co-workers are grunts, like yourself. Your manager didnt walk on the backs of the poor & naive to be spoken to by mere mortals like yourself. Join the buzhwa burgeou upper administration and youll understand; theyre just better people. 3) During cunnilingus. 4) Aside from breaking the monotony, deep down people not only know that piggies - swimming in their own filth - are somehow cute, but the name also means the english verb, "to boink". This subconsciously conjures images of sliding your pecker into a big ol' piggy in the troth, which is comedic gold, so long as its not one of those damn dirty vietnamese pot bellies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobitussinEF Posted September 27, 2003 Share Posted September 27, 2003 1. Why do we hiccup? 2. Where is the Zip file for the fonts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ganny McVagflaps Posted September 27, 2003 Share Posted September 27, 2003 Wait, she likes a jersey accent? I'm fairly certain there's laws against taking advantage of those kind of women. It's a bleedin' Dublin accent ya poxy cunt. I'll kick yer head in and all. As for laws, so bleedin' wha? They wouldn't send me to jail anyway, 'cause I'd take over the place, like. Righ', I'm off to nick a few cans of Bavaria Crown and a pack a king-sized Rizlas from the offie. Anyone want anythin'? QUESTION: Who the fuck is actually buying those Marilyn Manson C.D.'s? Is it you.....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigChiefSlapaho Posted September 29, 2003 Share Posted September 29, 2003 1) Why does it hurt so bad when you're pissing and all of a sudden you have to stop, say because your grandmother walks in on you or something? 2) What's it like to be a gay football player? 3) Why is a penis so simple in design and a pussy so complicated? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigChiefSlapaho Posted September 29, 2003 Share Posted September 29, 2003 What the FUCK is going on in 2Track's avatar?!??!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobitussinEF Posted September 29, 2003 Share Posted September 29, 2003 Ill put my money on it that its some sort of Jap verion of Las Ketchup Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reverend Jax Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 Hand lotion during masturbation: exessive and unnecesary, or the icing on the cake (pun intended)? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigChiefSlapaho Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 it's like... she's dancing... then she's praying... then two silicon implants fly out of her chest... and she stares at them in amazement... then smiles at them... all the while she's dancing... badly... then she does some anime Sailor Moon pose with her fingers in front of her face... WHAT THE FUCK?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobitussinEF Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 Why do Chief's bolas pican? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 1) A hiccup is backwards flatulence; your butt knows when the force of ass-gas is powerful enough to blow out an o-ring, and fortunately opts to dispel the force throughout your intestine, exiting your mouf. 2) Check your email. They shall be on the frontpage soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 It seems my pointing out of your obvious joisey accent has offended; i apologize. I'm sure living near the Sopranos is "cool". Onward. The demography for Manson cd's is interesting. For lack of a pie chart ability in this board, ill give percentages. 55% - "Goth-lite": They think they have a satanic sticker on their lunchboxes, but no..that's just Bad Religion, you wanker. 25% - Manson buys them back, to increase sales. He makes a surplus off the hermo porn, after removing the ribs & all that (you people believe everything you hear, eh?). His mom also buys a few. 15% - Church-groups, just so "no one else will buy them", often for burning (not copying). Their understanding of supply & demand is rather limited. 5% - Me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 1) Remember, girls have like 35 holes down there in the jaiknee area, its really weird. Weve got one, and to alternate the canal route midstream takes pressure. Pee-pee stops only for sneezes, and that's only because your pee knows your soul getting out is far more embarassing when pee is on your shoes. Truth is, the level of pain should depend on the offending party. The fact that it "really hurts" is indicitive of unresolved sexual issues with your grandmother, that needs be examined before meeting your girlfriend's parents. 2) For me, its hard to put into words. Dan Marino, however, once said "You know, its not easy going from tackling burly black men on the field to rimjobbing - just ask Bob Griese - but, 'ya know, you do it for the kids." 3) ...I think an analogy would work best here. Let's take a simple design, but one of great structural integrity, like the Empire State Building. Aerodynamic after some cutbacks, foreboding; a magnificent structure, one everybody should see. A simple design - were one to want to excite the building, you could just work the tip: the top 5 floors or so. Yeah, just like that, like the good girls in bejing...? anyway. Now, pretend we inverted it, into the ground. See how fucked up it gets? Now its all these floors, but theyre romparoo like inside out, and prolly smell like seaweed. There's seperate exits for everything, and its all hairy and moody WHERE THE #$%@ IS THAT ELEVATOR BUTTON, is this thing a fucking rubix cube?? Jesus, no wonder people are gay. Anyway, that should about explain it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 That's Aya Matsuura, japan's new Utada Hikaru wannabe, doing her damndest to prove that the power of love is all-consuming. Her complete surprise is a normal reaction to the physical manifestation of love itself, show by small pink hearts. Hewey Lewis first discovered this unusual power in the early 80's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 Hand lotion for the purpose of masturbation, while a ritual that outdates the Rosetta stone itself, has caused more than a few cases of chapped dick, and should be used in moderation. Though ambidextrous people have little to fear (except for freqeunt narcolepsy), they too have to stop at the point when youre cumming and its just air coming out. Not because of blindness or hairy palms, mind you, but fuckin hell, when you waddle around that way and youve been in the bathroom 23 minutes, we all know youre not going number 2. Especially god, who often watches masturbators and does this :dissappointed: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 The infamous "dancing/praying/things are coming from my breasts and it amazes me yet still i badly dance" thing is a bit of a taboo in monder japan, and points to a sorrid past. Review your bukkake collection, young Chieftan, and all will be revealed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 Chief's bolas pican when he thinks dirty thoughts of asian women, and 2T's avatar is not helping matters. His bolas prolly azul by now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigChiefSlapaho Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 Why is the company named "Sharp" yet they make nothing but blunt objects like televisions and calculators? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 Because Sharp knows its history. The Algonquin Indian nation, invetors of the abbacus (ancestor of the calculator), were also known to use them as weapons. The sususudio, as it was called, could only count to about 12 and a half, and due to odd boomerang properties, usually returned to injure its owner, after only angering its target. Today, Sharp continues this historical trend in its products, as many of their low-end stereo speakers can be used as weapons, but they sound kinda shitty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobitussinEF Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 1) Remember, girls have like 35 holes down there in the jaiknee area, its really weird. That was great! Question: What does the phrase "you vondrook" mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigChiefSlapaho Posted September 30, 2003 Share Posted September 30, 2003 1) Why is it that when you go to buy hot dog buns, you get, for example, a pack of 10 buns, but then when you go buy hot dogs, they come in packs of 8 or 12 or some multiple of 2 that doesn't meet your bun requirements? 2) Why do French people smell so fuckin' bad? 3) What would happen if I lit a girls ass on fire? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted September 30, 2003 Author Share Posted September 30, 2003 "Vondrook" is actually german for "the muffled screams of these dirty jews is irritating my ears; lets go have some farfugnuggen", roughly. Therefore, if someone says "you vondrook", theyre implying youre a neo-nazi in a casual way. Its a clever ploy to get a violent reaction out of you in response, thereby showing your nazi tendancies. Historically, this is what Judas whispered to Jesus in the gospel, but he also said something about really needin forty bucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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