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Hondo's Bar

Best Pick Up Lines


TulipO

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No one's ever gonna beat Sean Connery as bond.

 

In "Thunderball", i think it was, this chick is jet-skiing or some shit, gets a bit on 007 while he's over at a tiki bar.

Homegirl comes up and says "I'm sorry, Mr. Bond, you're all wet!"

"Yesh, but my martini's shtill dry. I'm Bahnd, James Bahnd..."

 

boom, next scene he's leaving the ho in bed, talking bout how he did what he did for queen & country.

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  • 4 weeks later...
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... And none've y'all have even cracked the seal. Yeh've gotta offer feelings & sincerity.

 

"Sit on my face & let me eat my way to your heart."

 

My face leaves in 5 minutes. Be on it.

 

And this isn't exactly a pick up line, but god if this creepy old Slim Dusty-lookin' Motherfucker wasn't dedicated when he saw this semi-unattractive blonde down at Black Duck an' says, loud enough for her to hear, "I'd crawl half a mile on broken glass just to hear you piss in a jam tin."

 

Another of those is "I'll eat a bucket of your shit with a toothpick just to sniff your crotch."

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Pick up lines dont normally work for me. Not surprising considering I've only ever tried them like twice and was too drunk to either remember them or say them right.

 

My method is much more subtle. To quote Adam Sandler in Big Daddy: "Initiating the conversation is half the battle" Its true too.

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  • 2 months later...

that chicks nice man, good work - any more for the hot chicks thread?

 

still my favorite of the thread:

 

Do you like fruit?

 

Suck me cock it's a peach.

 

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Do you like fridges?

 

Suck me cock it's cool.

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Do you like cocks?

 

Suck me cock it's a cock.

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