MyLeakyBucket Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 Read about this guy in the Boston Weekly Dig a while back. Basically told me he was a great stand-up comedian who died pretty young form a heart attack earlier this year. Decided to pick up his latest comedy CD/DVD, "Mitch Hedberg: Mitch All Together" and just can't believe how great he is. Sort of Demetri Martin but more cogent and off-the-wall. He spins one-liners like gun-fire, and when he is on....damn is he on!! For some CD samples for those interested: Mitch CD samples Some choice quotes so you can see what this guy is about: I want to climb a mountain -- not so I can get to the top -- cause I want to hang out at base camp. That seems fucking fun as shit. You sleep in a colorful tent, you grow a beard, you drink hot chocolate, you walk around... "Hey, you going to the top?" -- "Soon." I like baked potatoes, man. I don't have a microwave oven; it takes forever to cook a baked potato in a conventional oven. Sometimes I'll just throw one in there, even if I don't want one, because by the time it's done... who knows?...I'll throw a potato in and go on vacation. I saw a wino; he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude -- you have to wait!" I was in downtown Boise, Idaho, and I saw a duck, and I knew the duck was lost, 'cause ducks ain't s'posed to be downtown. There's nothin' for 'em there. So I went to a Subway sandwich shop, I said, "Let me have a bun." But she wouldn't sell me just the bun, she said that I had to have something on it. She told me it's against regulations for Subway to sell just the bun. I guess the two halves ain't supposed to touch. So I said, "Alright, well, put some lettuce on it," which she did. She said, "That'll be $1.75." I said, "It's for a duck." And they said, "All right, well, then it's free." See, I did not know that. Ducks eat for free at Subway! Had I known that, I would have ordered a much larger sandwich. "Let me have the Steak Fajita Sub - but don't bother ringing it up, it's for a duck! There are six ducks out there, and they all want Sun Chips!" I was at a bar once, and no one was talking to me 'cuz I just did a show, and I ran into a guy, and instead of saying "excuse me" he said "get the hell out of my way," so I said "Go to hell," and I ran away. He caught up to me, he had on a hat, a nose ring, an eybrow ring, a goatee, a tongue ring, and 3-earings. He said "Hey man, you have a lot of nerve," and then I said "Hey man, you have a lot of... cranial accessories." (crowd laughs) You guys are a smart crowd, when I do the dumber crowds, I have to say "Hey man, you have a lot of shit on your head!" I hate turtlenecks. I have such a weak neck. Plus if you wear a turtleneck it's like being strangled by a really weak guy ... all day. And if you wear a turtleneck and a backpack it's like a weak midget trying to bring you down. So many to choose from. The guy is the dogs bollocks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MetalHeart Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 A great man. Seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 La Lindsay's gonna love you when she sees this. On that note, ima listen to the compilation she left me tomorrow...ive only had it for like six months now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MetalHeart Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 I actually think of LL when I think Mitch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La Lindsay Posted October 21, 2005 Share Posted October 21, 2005 (edited) Awwww, yeah, I love him. I cried when I heard he died because it really is such a fucking shame. Two years in a row he came to Miami to perform and I was always busy with something so I told myself he would come to Miami again. He died a few months later. I kick myself for not going. Edited October 21, 2005 by La Lindsay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLeakyBucket Posted October 21, 2005 Author Share Posted October 21, 2005 It sucks how I have a habit of discovering someone after they've died so no new material to look forward to. What's that about. Anyway, glad everyone else has enjoyed his stuff. Nick, if you haven't tried it, you're in for a treat. The recent CD/DVD is brilliant. Has a great set on the CD and then Comedy Central performances (edited and unedited) on the DVD. Going to watch the Premier Blend one this morning, so not sure how great that'll be, but looking forward to it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 "My roomate, he says 'i need to shave, and take a shower. does anyone need ot use the bathroom?' Its like some weird-ass quiz, where he reveals the answer first." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- " "here's a picture of me when i was younger.' Every picture is of you when you're younger. 'here's a picture of me when im older.' You sonofabitch! howd you pull that off, lemme see that camera..." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "im tryin to, like....on street lights, green means go, and yellow means wait. on bananas, its the opposite. yellow means go ahead, and green means hold on. red means 'where the fuck did you get that banana at'?" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "if you had a friend that was a tighrope walker, and he tripped along the sidewalk? that'd be completely unnacceptable." ...i hope, next time i move, i get an easy number, like 222-2222. my friends'd go "how do i reach you?" and ill say "just press 2 for a while. when i answer, you can stop." more to come, no doubt. Thanks to LL and dante for "Strategic Grill Locations" making my shift go by better. ps severed foot = ultimate stocking stuffer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 one for the road: "I have an oscillating fan at home. it goes back and forth. it looks like it's saying 'no'. i like to ask it questions a fan would answer no to. 'do you keep my hair in place?' 'do you help me keep my documents in order?' 'do you have three settings? ... liar!' my fan fucking lied to me. now i willpull the pin up. now, you aint saying shit." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLeakyBucket Posted November 5, 2005 Author Share Posted November 5, 2005 I wanna be on a rice crispies box. snap crackle mitch and pop. in hollywood it's all about who you know, and i know crackle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 so, did he do anything besides "Strategic Grill Locations" and "Mitch all together" (which LL seems to have lost, sadly)? Ive just caught some of his cameos in Home Movies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iambaytor Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 (edited) NBA Superstar Shaquille O'Neal is Kazaam, a larger-than-life genie with a magic touch for nostop fun laughter! After 5,00 long years of captivity, Kazaam is set free to grant three wishes to a new master. From then on, he's catapulted to one wild adventure after another... from becoming the latest rap sensation ot untangling an outrageous mob scheme! As the giant genie with an attitude, Shaq scores big laughs in this hilarious comedy hit that's sure to be a slam-dunk winner with everyone! Edited July 22, 2018 by Iambaytor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senshik Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 I love Mitch... I was so sad last year when I heard he'd passed away... That sucked... He's so fucking awesome. The use of randomness in his jokes makd him so original, plus he seemed stoned every time so that was all the more histerical. All those reasons, He ruled. Mitch: "My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, but I said I wanted a regular banana, but later so, yeah... This joke is ridiculous. Allrrrright...." Why'd you have to go Mitch! WHY!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keth Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 to the pimp hand! <div style="background-color:#000000;width:368px;"><div style="padding:4px;"><p style="text-align:left;background-color:#FFFFFF;padding:4px;margin-top:4px;margin-bottom:0px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:12px;"><b>Comedy Central Stand-Up</b> <br/>Get More: <a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Joke'>http://www.jokes.com'>Joke'>http://www.jokes.com'>Jokes</a>,<a'>http://www.jokes.com'>Jokes</a>,<a'>http://www.jokes.com'>Jokes</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Joke of the Day</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com/funny/'>Funny'>http://www.jokes.com/funny/'>Funny'>http://www.jokes.com/funny/'>Funny Jokes</a></p></div></div> <div style="background-color:#000000;width:368px;"><div style="padding:4px;"><p style="text-align:left;background-color:#FFFFFF;padding:4px;margin-top:4px;margin-bottom:0px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:12px;"><b>Comedy Central Stand-Up</b> <br/>Get More: <a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Jokes</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Joke of the Day</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com/funny/'>Funny Jokes</a></p></div></div> <div style="background-color:#000000;width:368px;"><div style="padding:4px;"><p style="text-align:left;background-color:#FFFFFF;padding:4px;margin-top:4px;margin-bottom:0px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:12px;"><b>Comedy Central Stand-Up</b> <br/>Get More: <a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Jokes</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com'>Joke of the Day</a>,<a href='http://www.jokes.com/funny/'>Funny Jokes</a></p></div></div> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keth Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 I miss that hilarious man Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C_U_SPACECOWBOY Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 Such a unique voice and perspective. Sorely missed. Mitch, I hope you get to use a Gel Impact to write all your jokes now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donatella Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 Ugh I so loved that man. He's also not wrong. Uniballs are my shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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