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Posted

Which leads me to another gripe: When the fuck did it become so chic to

give your heart and/or vital organs to the hero of the story?

It's ridiculous!

Posted

Ok so it went far too long, there was no clear point, nobody in the whole movie could act, they had to add cheesy one liners and tits and ass everywhere to try to keep peoples attention, the transformers looked more like hobbits than fucking robots, every single actor looked like they had been locked in a solarium as well. Atleast in the first you got more of that hunky 'las vegas hotel' guy running in the desert.

 

Spent more time gripping the chair handle trying not to scream at the screen, sleeping and ulimately trying to find something sharp to gauge out my eyes. Alana has already mentioned one part where they go looking for a decepticon and when they get there 'Oh my god! It's a decepticon'! What the Fuck! I thought that was the point! oh wait no this whole movie had no point.

 

Oh crap have to go to my uni exam...

 

in short - DO NOT WANT!

Posted (edited)
Maybe its time some Ah-mer-eh-caaans review this now. The Australian contingent (now with 30% added Irishman) have had their says. i.e. I wanna see what Baytor says about it.

No you don't. Ralph Machio will have his say on Saturday after he see's it on Friday night in glorious IMAX! Life-size on-screen Optimus=win regardless of plot!

Edited by Mr. Hakujin
Posted

Baytor may not get to see it till next weekend. But he's a preview. Transformers started out as a 20 minute toy commercial/4-part mini series for Marvel Comics, it was a cheap gimmick then, Michael Bay cannot fuck it up, there is literally no way he can mess shit up worse than Pat Lee. NO WAY!

Posted (edited)

First off, the movie should be renamed 'Optimus Prime is a Fucking Badass (as if we already didn't know), and Pee Before Starting This Flick'. Yes, it was long, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. It was perfect to me. Comedy, drama, romance, BIG FUCKING ROBOTS KICKING ASS, MEGAN FOX!!!! I'm officially declaring her the hottest woman on the planet. I mean, what's up with all this hate? About the movie, I mean (anyone hating on Mrs. Fox should die a painful sexless death... or better yet, with

Devastator's balls

shoved up their ass). Back to the hate. The only complaint I can see people having is the length, but we already now I like 'stuff' good and looooong. Seriously, realism kinda goes out the window when you have alien robots that transform into vehicles in a movie. And the acting? Who goes to see the acting? I mean, this is like 'the Godzilla argument'. I couldn't get how people were like, 'the acting, the acting'! You don't go to Godzilla to see the acting! You go to see the BIG FUCKING LIZARD CRUSH BUILDINGS! Acting is what movies like Schindler's List are for. This movie was part one, but longer! Perfection!!! Man, people are nuts for not enjoying this movie for what it was (except Alana).

 

BRING ON PART 3!!!!!!

Edited by Panch
Posted

Baytor: So true! Whatever happened to Pat Lee anyway? He was such the comic book up-and-comer there for a while and the he just faded.

 

Panch: THANK YOU! I didn't read all your review lest it be spoiled, but your first line and the two things you emboldened give me hope. Those tools over at aicn.com have been teabagging and hot costnering the film all week. They're such geek elitists over there. I usually only get news at the site and skip the reviews for just that reason.

Posted
Baytor: So true! Whatever happened to Pat Lee anyway? He was such the comic book up-and-comer there for a while and the he just faded.

 

Panch: THANK YOU! I didn't read all your review lest it be spoiled, but your first line and the two things you emboldened give me hope. Those tools over at aicn.com have been teabagging and hot costnering the film all week. They're such geek elitists over there. I usually only get news at the site and skip the reviews for just that reason.

 

Read away, Mr. H. I tagged the only thing I thought might (although, already mentioned) be a spoiler.

Posted (edited)
Baytor: So true! Whatever happened to Pat Lee anyway? He was such the comic book up-and-comer there for a while and the he just faded.

 

Hopefully he died a painful and violent death.

 

He, Rob Liefeld, and Todd McFarlane probably sit in their skull shaped fortress on some island in the pacific and blow each other all day.

Edited by Iambaytor
Posted
He, Rob Liefeld, and Todd McFarlane probably sit in their skull shaped fortress on some island in the pacific and blow each other all day.

 

I hear Kirkman's their lemon-scented moist towellette boy.

Posted
Hopefully he died a painful and violent death.

 

He, Rob Liefeld, and Todd McFarlane probably sit in their skull shaped fortress on some island in the pacific and blow each other all day.

 

wait, you hate Pat Lee now? he was alright in the day, as i recall.

Posted

I saw it last night online and I still feel like I was robbed.

 

Poor Pacing

Shit acting

Fights were meh (But the forest fight was fun)

Lack of plot/story

Everything

 

I saw it last night online and I still feel like I was robbed.

 

Please disregard Panch's review.

He Clearly has Michael Bay cock in his mouth.

Posted
It's for a different thread, I guess, but if you're not well-versed in my Kirkman-hate at this point, then you know nothing about me.

Apparently. I look forward to that thread, then.

Posted

The invincible thread's a good start, if I think of anywhere else I'll link you to it(the gospel must be heard).

 

Newt- to be fair, did you have any kind of expectation?

Posted
The invincible thread's a good start, if I think of anywhere else I'll link you to it(the gospel must be heard).

 

Newt- to be fair, did you have any kind of expectation?

 

Nope

 

When I watch a movie

 

the less I know the better

 

Just watch the trailer once and try not to know anymore then what I saw

 

I go in without the hype or the bias.

Posted

I expected it to be at least average.

 

It was shit. It was about an hour too long, the dialogue was beyond woeful. The fights were just stupid and there was far too much of them. The whole thing was a wankfest for megan *look at my new lips and breasts* fox.

 

It pissed all over the good work done by the first one.

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