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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra


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Yes it'll probably be crap but I'm interested in giving it a shot because it has two things going for it. One, it has Stephen Sommers directing and he has proven to make very entertaining schlock. And two, it has Jospeh Gordon-Levitt as Cobra Commander, which is such strange unconventional casting that I've just gotta know how it turns out.

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Oooooh, that trailer made me feel tingly in all the right places! And is that Noomsie ("I'll destroy you [snaps fingers] just like that.") from Golden Child as a maskless Destro?!?!?!?

 

As for the pics: putting everyone in leather lessens the overt sex appeal of Teh Baroness (rrowwr) which was probably the first cartoon character I ever chubbed up from. Plus Storm Shadow in leather=WRONG in the eyes of Jehovah. Snake Eyes looks spot on though.

 

edit:

I watched it again frame by frame and noticed none of the classic G.I. Joe vehicles. ;_; I was hopping to see some of those, but I guess new vehicle designs = new toys=more money for Hasbro.

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Well that trailer showed a whole lot of nothing, but hey it looks like we get some cool Snake Eyes action. Also if the Baroness doesn't have a Ukranian accent I will be pissed as Baroness is hot for 3 reasons: 1) She just is, 2) The black framed glasses, 3) the accent. If you remove one of the 3 the whole system just fails.

 

Also I don't know if I can accept a GI Joe movie that doesn't start out with a man with a jet pack holding an American flag in his hands while he flies to the top of the statue of liberty.

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Also if the Baroness doesn't have a Ukranian accent I will be pissed as Baroness is hot for 3 reasons: 1) She just is, 2) The black framed glasses, 3) the accent. If you remove one of the 3 the whole system just fails.

 

I challenge that. Here she is missing 2 and 3 and I'd say number 1 is still holding strong.

 

sienna-miller-g-i-joe.jpg

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I challenge that. Here she is missing 2 and 3 and I'd say number 1 is still holding strong.

 

sienna-miller-g-i-joe.jpg

The motion is seconded and passed: Baroness is still hott w/out the glasses and accent. Next item on the agenda.

 

There's a new question on the floor: which major league Cobra member did Baroness most likely diddle around with behind Destro's back: Major Bludd, Zartan, Tomax, Xamot, Tomax AND Xamot, Dr. Mindbender, or a specially modified B.A.T. rigged for her pleasure?

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at least they're no longer peddling that bullshit UN Taskforce travesty

 

Well, I know you hate that for politicial reason.

 

Me, I always disliked UN taskforce setups in movies and books because they're so fuckin unrealistic. Like the UN could ever have the funding and political independence to actually be effective as some kind of global cop.

 

Unfortunately, GI JOE seems to have gone way too far in the other direction. It has this line in the trailer: "We don't answer to anyone." which seems much more realistic but makes me sick, politically speaking.

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lol I don't go to movies to have politics breathed down my throat, man. I go to be entertained. I can make my own opinions and don't need to be preached at.

 

But when I heard they were going to keep the core of this movie back to the original, I was really happy. I'm excited, now that I know they aren't bastardizing my childhood cartoon for political correctness the way they wanted

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Hey, after watching Surf's Up, Wall-E and a few others, i tend to be cautious when watching movies these days.

 

and lets not mince words: GI JOE in the 80's was unabashedly American and unabashedly anti-communist. That was, in all effects, Cold War Propaganda and I loved every minute of it as a kid. Kinda like Rocky IV

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