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UK TV viewers will not get to see an episode of South Park which shows Nicole Kidman and fellow Scientologist John Travolta attempting to coax a fictional Tom Cruise character out of a closet, with Kidman saying: "Don't you think this has gone on long enough? It's time for you to come out of the closet. You're not fooling anyone."

 

Naturally, the robustly heterosexual Top Gun star took exception to this when Trapped in the Closet aired in the US. The episode also showed Stan - believed by the Cruise character to be the reincarnation of Scientology founder L Ron Hubbard - having a pop at Cruise's acting abilities, and Cruise reportedly waved the legal big stick at Paramount and threatened to sue if the offending programme was ever shown again.

 

An insider said: "Tom is famously very litigious and will go to great lengths to protect his reputation. Tom was said not to like the episode and Paramount just didn't dare risk showing it again. It's a shame that UK audiences will never see it because it's very funny."

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SCIENCE OF MYTH

 

If you've ever question beliefs that

you hold you're not alone

But you oughtta realize that every myth

is a metaphor in the case of Christianity

and Judaism there exist the belief that

spiritual matters are enslaved to

history

The Buddhists believe that the functional aspects

override the myth

while other religions use the literal

core to build foundations with See

half the world sees the myth as fact w

hile it's seen as a lie by the other

half and the simple truth is that it's

none of that and somehow no matter

what the world keeps turning Somehow we

get by without ever learning

Science and religion are not mutually exclusive

In fact for better

understanding we take the facts of science and

apply them And if both

factors keep evolving then we continue

getting information but closing off

possibilities makes it hard to see the bigger

picture Consider the case of

the women whose faith helped her make it through

when she was raped and cut

up left for dead in a trunk her beliefs held true

It doesn't matter if it's

real or not cause some things are better left

without a doubt and if it

works then it gets the job done

Somehow, no matter what, the world keeps turning

 

(Ben Weasel)

 

You folks should buy this reckerd:

 

B0007M429Q.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

 

One of the best albums of all time. Beg, borrow or steal for this bad boy.

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Marry Christmas everybody.

 

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

is finding a Christmas tree.

 

The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

rigging up the lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

hangovers, rigging up the lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

sending Christmas cards, hangovers, rigging up the lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

five months of bills! Sending Christmas cards, hangovers, rigging up the lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

facing my in-laws, Five months of bills! Oh I hate those Christmas cards, hangovers, Rigging up these lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

salvation army, facing my in-laws, Five months of bills! Sending Christmas cards, oh jeez, i'm tryin' to rig up these lights, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

i want a transformer for Christmas, charities and whaddaya mean YOUR in-laws, Five months of bills! oh making out these cards, uh just get me a beer huh?,what we have NO extension cords?, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

finding parking spaces, daddy I want some candy, donations, facing my in-laws, Five months of bills! Writing out those Christmas cards, hangovers, Now why the hell are they blinking?, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

batteries not included, no parking spaces, buy me something, get a job you bum, facing my in-laws, Five months of bills! ho-ho Christmas cards, oh jeez look at this, one light goes out they all go out, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Stale TV specials, batteries not included, no parking spaces, (childish mumbling), charities, She's a witch I hate her, Five months of bills! I don't even know half these people, oh who's got the cherry picker?, someone get a flashlight I blew a fuse!, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

singing Christmas carols, stale TV specials, batteries not included, no parking?, (child crying), charities, gotta make 'em dinner, Five months of bills! I'm not sending 'em this year that's it!, shut up you, Fine you're so smart you rig up the lights!, and finding a Christmas tree.

 

 

What's that?? Christmas was weeks ago. AHHHHHH ^_^:birf2::party::birf::censored: and :censored: :censored: son of a :censored: mother :censored: :censored: licking :censored: :censored: :censored: sheep loving :censored: goat humping bastard. When I find the bastard who lied to me he's getting a :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: the hard way. :fuming:

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Iggy Pop and the Stooges, Franz Ferdinand, and Mars Volta (Who suck live, incidently....) = great....

 

But seeing Meg White try to seduce the audience with the worlds BIGGEST camel toe totally topped the day.

 

Until I saw a midget in a bright pink fairy outfit. That shit was hilarious.

Edited by ArNaH
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My dad on the phone: So I went to see Brokeback Mountain.

 

Me: So how was it?

 

My dad: I didn't like it.

 

Me: How come?

 

My dad: It was a chick flick. I don't like chick flciks. I didn't like Titanic. I don't like that shit when it's with heteros, why would I like the same shit with a bunch of queers?

 

Me: You didn't take any satisfaction in the fact that your were watching and supporting something that enrages conversatives?

 

My dad: Well, yeah, that's the reason I went to see it in the first place, but that doesn't mean I liked it.

 

My dad's always good for a laugh.

Edited by Jack's Meandering Thoughts
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