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Blargh - The Random Thread


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An old Italian gentleman lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

 

Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days. Love, Papa

 

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

 

Dear Papa, Don’t dig up that garden. That’ s where the bodies are buried. Love, Vinnie

 

At 4 a.m. The next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

 

Dear Papa, Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. Love you, Vinnie

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$8450 Audioquest speaker cables yield interesting reviews

 

We live underground. We speak with our hands. We wear the earplugs all our lives.

 

PLEASE! You must listen! We cannot maintain the link for long... I will type as fast as I can.

 

DO NOT USE THE CABLES!

 

We were fools, fools to develop such a thing! Sound was never meant to be this clear, this pure, this... accurate. For a few short days, we marveled. Then the... whispers... began.

 

Were they Aramaic? Hyperborean? Some even more ancient tongue, first spoken by elder races under the red light of dying suns far from here? We do not know, but somehow, slowly... we began to UNDERSTAND.

 

No, no, please! I don't want to remember! YOU WILL NOT MAKE ME REMEMBER! I saw brave men claw their own eyes out... oh, god, the screaming... the mobs of feral children feasting on corpses, the shadows MOVING, the fires burning in the air! The CHANTING!

 

WHY CAN'T I FORGET THE WORDS???

 

We live underground. We speak with our hands. We wear the earplugs all our lives.

 

Do not use the cables!

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