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Hondo's Bar

Freak Out Your Roommate!


Jumbie

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Top Ten Ways to Freak Out Your Roommate

 

10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names.

Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato

from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's

potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, ''He just didn't

belong.''

 

9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if

he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on

the empty side of the room with concern.

 

8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every

day. Look at it and say, ''The hair, it's growing. Growing!''

 

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing

so, look at your roommate and mutter, ''Soon, soon....''

 

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the

room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at

the pencil.

 

5) Tell your roommate, ''I've got an important message for

you.'' Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't

remember what the message was. Later on, say, ''Oh, yeah, I

remember!'' Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several

weeks.

 

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling.

When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head,

and moan.

 

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore

the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then

say, ''Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?'' Complain loudly

that you are hungry.

 

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, ''Hooray! You're

back!'' as loud as you can and dance around the room for five

minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying,

''Shouldn't you be going somewhere?''

 

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act

offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to

clean it up, explaining, ''No, I want to watch them suffer.'''

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