Take Me To Your Lizard

I been buying this new soft drink recently, Diet Coke with Lemon. Might not seem like much, but read it again. Diet Coke with Lemon. With Lemon, baby! It's so nice and they've got an offer on at Woolworth's. On the other hand, it's probably a copy of something you Yanks have had for ages. Who knows? Not me, and since you can't reply I ain't gonna anytime soon, either. Well, you could send an IM but that would be way too much fuss over a bloody cola. I mean c'mon people, get a life.

A song I'm always impressed with, every damn time I hear it, is Billy Joel's Piano Man. It's got great lyrics and real poetic meaning. Here's a bit: 'And the waitress is practicing politics As the businessmen slowly get stoned Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness But it's better than drinkin' alone ... Chorus ... It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday And the manager gives me a smile 'Cause he knows that it's me they've been comin' to see To forget about life for a while And the piano, it sounds like a carnival And the microphone smells like a beer And they sit at the bar and put bread in my jar And say, "Man, what are you doin' here?"' -Billy Joel, Piano Man.

My title is now 'Avatar'... I am an avatar... I am my avatar? I am Hobbes! Mmm, tuna sandwich!

Look, I'm not responsible for any of this shit. No, no, listen - I'll just go out for the day and leave them here, how's that for sorting it out?

The Thunder God went riding Upon his favourite filly "I'm Thor!" he cried, the horse replied "You forgot your thaddle, thilly."

I don't know if this is quite the place, but I had to tell somebody. I'm quite depressed. I've been doing work on the side as a circus organiser - I'm responsible for sorting out our various acts and putting together the show. But yesterday my main attraction, Dum Dum the human cannonball, had a tragic accident and died. Sure, we could hire another human cannonball act, but we've invested a lot into Dum Dum. You see, he's a midget and we had a small cannon especially cast for him - another guy just wouldn't fit. Yes, we'll not see an artist of his caliber again.

Let me get this straight... you want to go on a magic carpet ride to see the king of the potato people, and bargain with him for your life, and you're telling me you're sane?

It's not Simpsons so sorry if this is off-topic, but what do people think of Futurama? It never seems to be much appreciated but I love it! Maybe it doesn't quite match up to The Simpsons but it has some genuinly great moments. I especially love Zoidberg - he's so pathetic and useless it's hilarious. (Being held at knifepoint by a lunatic) "Hooray, I'm helping!"

I've just listed half my Stephen King books on Ebay. It makes me sad to live in a small room now. Other items are soon to go. *sigh*

Are you maybe thinking of "One Hit Wonder" which has some lyrics very close to that? "He knows if he ever gets the chance He'd sell his soul To make the monster dance They can't hurt you unless you let them" It's just that I'm a bit of a fan, and haven't heard of that track myself.

I've been thinking about my place in the Universe. I thought how huge the Universe was. So huge I couldn't really comprehend it. I thought even how huge our Galaxy, our solar system, our world was. It made me feel very small and insignificant. I thought "I am just one man in all this chaos" I thought "What difference can I possibly make?" Then I thought "Aw, who cares?" and went to have lunch. Mmm, sandwich.

Walla Walla by Offspring. "Do I wear you out? You must wonder why I'm relentless and all strung out I'm consumed by the chill of solitary" It has occured to me that there are search engines on the net that let you find lyrics. I don't know if any let you search the actual words rather than song/band name, but a search in google would surely find the song you want anyway. Only honest people on this thread!

Thanks for the new Petty song, I'm liking it. As for Cake, I quite like a song of theirs called "Friend is a Four Letter Word". My own recommendation would have to be a band I've liked for years - Everclear. They have a reputation as a bit of a wannabe indie/pop mixture, but their old stuff is great post-grunge goodness. One song from each of their first three albums: "Sparkle" from World of Noise "You Make Me Feel Like a Whore" from Sparkle and Fade "Amphetamine" from So Much for the Afterglow

"Julia... Julia... Julia..." Julia, by John Lennon. New lyrics: "They found her out in the fields About a mile from home Her face was warm from the sun But her body was cold"

Principle: Buttered toast in free fall will land butter-side down (frequency of this directly proportional to quality of carpet) Principle: Cat in free fall will land feet-down. Proposal: The Buttered Cat Array A means of providing near-limitless vertical lift for transportation in a gravity field. Cats with buttered toast strapped to their backs will be in perpetual limbo between these two laws of nature, and thus hover. Amount of lift can be varied by sliding various pieces of carpet under the buttered cats.

They're putting in new carpets tomorrow. Lifting the dark underbelly of my living space and fitting a new one - like you can just ... do that! I mean, it's like ... aaargh! Bastards!

No no no, What I hate is being a clueless newbie, playing with the search facility, coming to this thread and replying without reading the initial premise ie to not reply. And what's worse, I've now gone and replied AGAIN, further degenerating the thread into order and breaking the fragile chaos that was it's entire existence. Nonetheless, I thought it apt to point out that I'm not a troll, just an idiot. Sorry, I'll go sit in the corner and leave you to it.

Ok, some good choices so far . But how about some more girl-next-door types that are nonetheless drop-dead gorgeous. For your viewing pleasure: Claire Danes and Natalie Portman.

Amen to that! I was going to do Law but then realised I'm not devious or vicious enough, and don't really want to do a degree that by all accounts is bloody boring as hell. So here I am doing English and Philosophy, wahey!