defgoddess

O CRUNK DA SHIZNIT TO BETHLEHEM MUTHAFUCKA...

so my mom says my dad doesn't think it's moral for me to spend the night at my bf's (and NO genital interlocking, say thankya), yet it's ok for him to leave over a dozen porn sites in the cache for my siblings to accidentally click on? and... tranny porn??? w.t.f.

sigh. home=pas de liberte. gonna have to fight the law of the father against its subjugation and unconscious desire to control my burgeoning sexuality. baahhh dammit. i was so looking forward to sleepovers this break so i wouldn't have to deal with fambly crap. instead i get the 'not under my roof' spiel. well like scott peterson i'ma contest this shite!! ...too soon?

sigh english project done and patron letter. moving on to english presentation. but hey it's on buffy so i can do no wrong!!

... so... tired... eyes hurt... so... stabbing the hours... fukk dalloway...

gawd why must i keep seeing that ugly gal up top... so hard... to look away... like... human train wreck... gah!

goddammit. motivation is... not for sale anywhere...

uh huh i was out to eat... i was... yes i have talked to him some... uh huh... hoo boy bad me.

omfg. wtf. lmao. all of these online acronyms fulfill the feelings i felt as i checked my email. ah, facebook. bringing people from colleges everywhere together. including, evidently, my ex-bf (online). somehow through the power of search feature, he found me. there is no smiley to capture this. hooooly crap./strongbad not that i have any regrets or anything like that, i noticed he's 'very conservative' and all down with the college republicans and 're-elect bush' and 'boo united nations.' ... uh huh. but it is a wee bit weird that evidently all the guys i fall in love with look like... well each other.

billy joooeelll... come out virginia don't let me wait you catholic girls start much too late but sooner or later it comes down to fate i might as well be the one...

femme francaise, quelqu'un? eh?

w00t for pop-punk-emoness! hope dangles on a string like slow spinning redemption winding in and winding out the shine of it has caught my eye roped me in, so mesmerizing so hypnotizing i am captivated i am vindicated

i was talking to my friend and i replied and i got her away message. and i waited a few minutes but she was gone. watching a movie. she didn't even say she was going. or bye. or something. i feel so horrible. i just want someone to cuddle with who will make me feel better. but i guess no one wants that job or feels like being around to do it. why am i on fucking blargh sobbing where is someone??? i don't ask for much... i thought... what did i do?

did i mention my ex is now rebounding with a high school girl who used to have a huge crush on him but he scoffed and said he'd -never- go out with her? does god hold up any clearer signs that say "KILL YOURSELF NOW"... or maybe it's something else?

mmm narcotics... whoooooo boy i can't wait to get all my stuff i n the mail !! i love mail... boxes... of stuff... anybody wana do my presentation on credit cards for me? mayybe?

2 vicodin: too much=badness 1 vicodin: too little=badness 1 1/2=sleepy goodness let's hope i'm up in time to get leahdoll's call! us grrls gotta hang out... seeing as how she didn't know about the demise of my 'lationship or my... sorta demise... read the boards indianoid! your east-coast irishman knows more than you.

can i die yet

eh who needs class??

ow. :( can i just stay curled up in bed and die? i don't even want to face anyone. my loser rejected self with the blisters. i probably have like shingles. fcuk god in the ear.

sigh. well either way i'd have felt ugly and unwanted... at least there's always lindsay...

hmm so again my former belief that i'll let guys approach me has again become a belief. i never seem to get anywhere. but hey that pike guy in the av library keeps asking me to come over, i think tonight i may just take him up on that. lauren with a frat guy... truth is indeed stranger than fiction.

way too many things... random pain! bah!

I had opinions That didn't matter I had a brain That felt like pancake batter

sigh. just get it over with man. i don't care if this all new and confusing to you. my feelings are withering outside on the cold ground. please notice them there shivering.

sigh together for like 4 hours. though i was asleep for about a half hour during chappelle's show. full belly, comfy chair with flannel blanket, and current object of my affections close at hand. toasty happiness does not get much better.