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Terrible Rap


Thelogan
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So for decades now we've been assaulted by naive folks who don't grasp that there's more to rapping than Dr. Suess style rhyming of the last word of every sentence. There is almost always some lame "street slang" thrown in that just sounds stiff and unnatural, possibly even bordering on racist. These atrocities come in many forms: from well intentioned public service commercials, to old people, to run-of-the-mill talentless delusional idiots.

The shit makes me cringe, and the fact that it's usually perpetuated by caucasians pours a little more juice in my shame cup as well.

 

There's also plenty of people that fancy themselves part of the industry that are just terrible. That would go here too.

Example time.

 

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  • 1 month later...

If someone generalized and asked me if I like Blondie, I would say 'sure'. I like Blondie just fine. I'm a fan of the group.

 

Now...around the 2 minute mark of Rapture I start to convulse. Stop it Debbie! Stop it right fucking now! If you say 'mars' one more goddamn time, I swear to fucking god...

 

It gets all this praise for being the first rap song to top the charts, and it doesn't deserve it. It's awful. And it's sad that it took a hot white chick to make hip-hop palatable.

 

And anoth...wait, is that Flava Flav?

 

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I've cut Nicki Minaj far more slack than she deserves, mostly because i like her bit in Monster. I was even willing to disregard some of the stuff I heard off her solo album, because it's more pop and the genre isn't really my thing. So I ignored it, for the most part, and gave her a pass.

 

No more. I have to draw a line in the sand somewhere, and she's all out of chances. This belongs here, and SHIT is it ever painful to listen to.

 

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