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Best Pick Up Lines


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So this one is ripped off from Napoleon Dynamite , but it's fucking hilarious. My "good friend" used it to pick me up :D


"Are you drinking skim milk because you think you're fat? Cuz you could drink 2 percent or even whole if you wanted to."

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hah, yeah I loved that scene. it was so awkward.


Ok, I have one that I've never used but I used to think it was kinda smooth. I came up with it maybe three years ago but anyways...here goes nothing: *warning: the following has not been tested and should probably never be used*


"You must have been Hell-sent, because God would never allow me a vision of Heaven so soon."


I think the cheesiest though, is from Night at the Roxbury:


"Peeaaaooohh booooh peaaaaaooooh boooh."

"What are you doing?"

"That's the sound of the ambulance coming to take me away. Because the sight of you stopped my heart from beating."


Oh are we supposed to do best? Don't pick up lines always fail anyways?

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HA! Yeah, they usually do. I think the only reason I got w/ my, umm "good friend," was because it was a Napoleon Dynamite quote, not the line itself.


I always like the classic "Nice shoes...wanna fuck?"


And the mellower, but equally funny and to the point: "So, you wanna go make out?"

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other classics:


"baby, your feet tired? cause you been runnin' through my mind all day."


"When they made the alphabet, the shoulda put U and I together."


and such...me and an old buddy used to have competitions at social places for who'd run the worst line, straight-faced, on the hottest chick. My personal fave was the ever-present:


"You have any irish in you? Would you like some?"


...which at least left you with a "pssh" at worst, a wink and a smile at best. Then m'boy - who was haitian - ran that one and got slapped. No lie. I think this kinda shit should be in sociology classes.

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Again, classics, but I don't think these will work:



"I lost my phone number, can I have yours?"


"Hey, my buddy over there wants to know what you think of me..."


"If I told you, you had a great body, would you hold it against me?"

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HA! This shit is funny. I also always liked

"That outfit looks great on you, but you know how it could look better? Crumpled up on my bedroom floor."



"That shirt's very becoming on you. Of course, if I were on you, I'd be coming too."


And lets not forget:

"Hey do you want to go get breakfast tomorrow morning? Yeah? Should I call you or nudge you?"

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