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Awful Movie Appreciation


Keth

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Well, I mentioned it in shoutbox a while back and actually got newt and JZA to offer their love: I find Escape from LA to be a better and better movie with every viewing.

 

Also, not about a movie per se, but I thought the Ewoks were one of the best things about ROTJ.

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Snakes on the Plane wasn't as bad as it needed to be, my dissapointment with it was based on the fact that it was just too good for what it was. It was the most odd complaint about a movie I've ever had in retrospect. The Blair Witch is indeed pretty bad, so bad that Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows was a much better move and that movie was pretty bad too so that's saying something. Maybe if they ever get around to making Blair Witch 3: Sweet Onion Cheddar Unleashed Part 2: The Reckoning Harder it'll finally be what it has potential to be.

 

So, I think we need to start dropping some real terrible movies in here. Hit it!:

 

First up, one I proudly own and quote quite often:

street_fighter.jpg

 

I fucking love this movie so much. Some saw this being Raul Julia's last performance as a bad thing, but the man clearly fucking owns this movie and has some of the finest lines in it. He's obviously hamming it up and seems to be the only person in the cast who's in on the joke that this is a terrible movie. I'd post some of the best lines but there's too many, so here

 

Also this:

 

 

Next up is an American movie classic:

face_off.jpg

The premise essentially is that Cage is a terrorist and Travolta is a government agent and Travolta wears Cage's face and poses as him so he can get the location of a bomb from Cage's brother. But Cage wakes up and puts Travolta's face on and this happens:

 

 

 

Okay, I'm not going to post Troll 2 since pretty everybody knows that one by now. It's the new Plan 9 or Manos: Hands of Fate. I will however draw your attention one of the two movies claiming to be Troll 3. The Crawlers. Troll 3 features no trolls, no goblins, nor any mythical creatures at all. It features killer plants that were mutated by chemical waste. If you wanted to know if Troll 3 managed to be better than Troll 2, well:

 

 

 

Hey remember Tom Green? Remember when some crazed studio executive decided to let him make a movie? Let me refresh you!

freddy_got_fingered_ver1.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then there's Cliffhanger

 

cliffhanger_remake.jpg

 

I couldn't find any clips of John Lithgow unfortunately, as his "British" accent (particularly when he says "bastard") is the real star of this movie. But here's some random over-acting:

 

 

Edited by Iambaytor
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Face/ Off was a bad movie?

 

-------------------------------------

 

You mentioned Stallone so I have to say that I LOOOVE Demolition Man.

 

 

And the fact that you appreciate Freddie got Fingered in any way, be it ironic or post-modernist deconstructionist or whatever means I've just lost at least 10% of the considerable respect you've earned with me over the years regarding your opinion on art.

Edited by Jumbie
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And the fact that you appreciate Freddie got Fingered in any way, be it ironic or post-modernist deconstructionist or whatever means I've just lost at least 10% of the considerable respect you've earned with me over the years regarding your opinion on art.

 

I appreciate Freddy Got Fingered in the same way I appreciate a crazed homeless person on a street corner shouting obscenities at passersby. It's amusing just to watch someone be off their rocker fucking crazy for once. It's like the 4chan of movies.

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I appreciate Freddy Got Fingered in the same way I appreciate a crazed homeless person on a street corner shouting obscenities at passersby. It's amusing just to watch someone be off their rocker fucking crazy for once. It's like the 4chan of movies.

 

 

An obscene homeless man is INTERESTING to watch.

 

Freddie got Fingered is boring. You cannot enjoy it for its absurdity because of how easily you end up getting the urge to go do something else. Which is why I've never watched more than 10 minutes of it at a time.

 

I could, and have, watched an obscene homeless person go nuts for much much longer than that.

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I saw the trailer for that and I can't even bear to watch the whole thing, not even the Rifftrax. It just looks too painfully horrible.

 

P.S. Also, I agree on The Dead Next Door (to a degree) and on Shoot 'Em Up (much much better than Crank)

Edited by Iambaytor
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