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SiBob Speaks and offers Sagely Tubby Advice


Silent Bob

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I only have two of his dvds so far - Dress to Kill and Circle (for the record, I like D2K the best) - but I'm working on completing the collection.

 

Christy and I found all of em at the tower records here in dallas... I love all of them way too much to pick a favorite though..

 

question...

 

IM Ron Burgendy?

 

and

 

Would you be shocked to death if you had to answer a REAL question?

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Would you be shocked to death if you had to answer a REAL question?

 

Yes, probably.

 

What Would Jesus Do for a Klondike Bar?

 

I've answered this question before in my LiveJournal, but for the sake of everyone here, I shall do so again.

 

What would Jesus do for Klondike Bar? I bet he'd do a lot. Walk on water. Fly. Heal the sick.

 

In fact, I wonder if that's really what the whole New Testament was about? Maybe a couple decades after the fact all the Christians got together and thought it was best to change it:

 

"Y'know...this whole giving-up-his-life-for-a-Klondike-Bar thing might end up seeming a little unimpressive to future generations. Maybe we should make it something a little bigger?"

 

"Well like what? An icecream sandwich?"

 

"No, I dunno, something like...uh...eternal salvation."

 

"Eh, I guess... but does that mean we can't celebrate the Resurrection with dessert anymore?"

 

"Wait, fuck that, I'm not giving up the dessert, we'll keep the dessert in our celebrations"

 

"But how will we explain to future generations the relationship between the crucifixion and chocolate? That just doesn't make any sense!"

 

"We'll add bunnies to the mix"

 

"Praise the Lord! Everything has become so clear!"

 

On a related note, how does St Peter eat a Reeses? Upside down.

 

Aaaaand I'm going to hell.

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What's your favorite animal?

 

What color are your eyes?

 

What's your favorits color?

 

Do you believe in something that no one else believes in?

 

I'm terribly fond of my cats.

 

blue...a very nice blue, so I'm told. I can't really see 'em myself.

 

aquamarine

 

I believe...that...the children are our future. I mean, you can teach them well, but listen, you gotta let them lead the way.

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What kind of music do you listen to?

 

Classic and contemporary rock, mostly. Alternative. Anything with a good beat, good guitars an' good vocals.

 

Do you like Brak's Song "I Love You Baby"?????

 

Do you like the Brak show?

 

Yes aaaaaaaand yes

 

What would you consider a serious question?

 

That

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What song would you have played at your funeral?

 

oh thats a good question... lol i wish i had asked it lol hahah dowe valerie and I discussed this after Ian's funeral

 

 

my questions..

 

Is my sig picture less scary to you now?

 

Whats your favorite book?

 

Do you spell color and favorite with the U (colour favourite)?

 

If not do you hate it when Americans do?

 

Why does funeral have the word FUN in it... funerals are so not fun? :(

 

Are any of those what you would consider a serious question?

and if so are you dead from the shock?

thats all for now...

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Is my sig picture less scary to you now?

 

Much, thankyou.

 

Whats your favorite book?

 

The Gospel According to Saint Bastard

 

No, I dunno, I can't pick a favorite, I like many. Do comic books count? Then I like even more.

 

Do you spell color and favorite with the U (colour favourite)?

 

I do, whenever possible, even though I'm American. I also spell theatre...uh...like that. And I pronounce "erbs" as "herbs" because there's a fucking H in it.

 

And I spell through like "thruff"

 

Why does funeral have the word FUN in it... funerals are so not fun?

 

I don't know, why do flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

 

Are any of those what you would consider a serious question?

and if so are you dead from the shock?

 

Why yes, a couple of those were serious questions, and I nbhjyjyjikumujmmmmmmm

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Why did you slam your head into the keyboard? It's a legitimate question. lol

 

I slammed my head on the keyboard because I was...faking death. You asked a serious question about whether or not I'd die if you asked a serious question and I... well, look, you need to keep up with me on these things, we gotta keep the synergy going.

 

  If you could make up a word and have it published in Webster's, what would it be and why?

 

I wouldn't really make up a word, so much as I would change a word. Long ago I decided to stop using the past tense of "explode" because I think it sounds silly and redundant. So if I had the power, the past tense of "explode" would forever become "explew".

 

Same goes for "implode".

 

  If you could make up a Dance what would it be? But it has to be a real one not a crap one.

 

Wait, you say it has to be a real dance, but I'd be completely making it up. You have sown the seeds of contradiction with your question and now my answer is reaping confusion...

 

  What is your new Sig from cause I could swear Ive seen it before (unless I havent) smile.gif

 

It, and my new avatar, and my new LJ icon are all from the video for TISM's very funny and often appropiate song Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me

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And I pronounce "erbs" as "herbs" because there's a fucking H in it.

 

 

that cracked my shit up... never did undertsand why they spell something so differently than it sounds. English language would be a lil easier if it was spelled like it was effing said.

 

? ? ? how many seconds does something have to be on the ground from falling, before you throw it away as opposed to eating it? 3 ? 5? so many people have different time standards, and I, for one, would like to know your standards ol buddy.

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? ? ?  how many seconds does something have to be on the ground from falling, before you throw it away as opposed to eating it? 3 ? 5?  so many people have different time standards, and I, for one, would like to know your standards ol buddy.

 

In general, the 5-second rule applies, however there are some very specific instances that require a change of the rules.

 

1. Milk. Milk has a no second rule. Once milk hits the ground, you really shouldn't try to salvage it, nor should you cry, you big fuckin' baby!

 

2. Bread. 5-second rule only applies when the bread lands butter side up, so obviously the 5-second rule never applies.

 

3. Gum. Now technically, the 5-second rule can apply to gum, but it'll take you longer than five seconds to get that crap off the pavement, so it's a useless endeavor.

 

It should also be noted, and this is more of a personal preference than an official rule, woman can lie on the ground for hours and I still have no qualms against eating.

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Sorry sometimes Im retarded and I dont remember everything that I've typed, as Im sure you dont either. Sorry I lost the synergy. :D

 

When I said it had to be a real made up dance I meant that it had to make sense and couldnt be stupid. Sorry for the confusion.

 

So.........you didnt have to be mean. :D

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