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Ask Tulip--get your ass kicked


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:D Oh JESUS! Here we go. Of course the first question would have to be this ego-centric and ridiculous! It's always "Do you like me," "can i come over" "if I give you 5 dollars and a cookie will you be my friend!"

Dammit! The universe doesn't like REVOLVE around YOU man. Here's the deal, just wise up to the fact that nobody likes you. Nobody really likes anyone...but especially you.


Secret fortune of the day: You will step in something unpleasant later. Probably poo, but when it happens you won't really be sure WHAT it is. Then you will be walking around all day thinking "What the hell WAS that?!?!" he everyone will be like: "Whoa, that chick smells."


Lucky Numbers: 69; 12,000,000,000,000; 666 and 4.

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DOES LIKE YOU FOR--what the fuck?! OF COURSE he doesn't like YOU for YOU! Who would? Seriously here, am I gonna have to deal with this stupidity on a regular basis? Guys never like a girl for "who she is." Especially when the chick in question is YOU. Nah, my guess: he's in it for the sex. Entirely. And when you're like talking to him and stuff, he really doesn't care what you have to say. He's imagining things like...spankings. And...cheetos.

My advice is stick with him. Even though he probably thinks you're pretty lame except for you permissive sexual nature (which is obvious. To everyone.) it's never really gonna get any better than that. Unless of course you make a lot of money. Then you could maybe get a better looking dude who only cares about sex.


Damn. If you want someone to listen to you and depend on you and stuff, ge a pet. Like a goldfish or any iguana. Other, furrier animals are WAY too smart, and probably wouldn't like you. They'd just keep you around for the regualr meals.


Secret fortune You will trip and fall on your face in public. Man will everyone laugh!


Lucky Numbers: .000001; 1/2; 3 3/4

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:D Some people just need a slap every now and again. Some more often than others. WILL IT MAKE ME MAD?!?!?! EVERYTHING MAKES ME MAD DAMMIT! However, the upside here is that if you keep asking questions, I get to make fun of you...and that's one of the things that doesn't make me quite as mad. Ask away you silly little freak. I'll keep launching insults at you. It could be like a symbiotic relationship.
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Tulip, what does it sound like, when doves cry?



You got a tape recorder at home? Kay. Here's what you do. Grab that thing. Hit record, and then talk into it for a while. Then, when you can't stand to hear yourself talk anymore (Oh MAN! This could keep you busy for HOURS!) hit stop. Play it back, and I think the answer to this question will be clear. Oh, but you have to imagine that the doves in question are really whiny and insidious and occasionally sound like someone's butt.


Also, what really happened to Devil's Advoc8, and does it invovled Cashel's zany hijinx?


Fuck's sake, aren't YOU supposed to be the omniscient one? I see what this is, you don't know shit, MR. Smartest Hondonian, you just go around jackin' answers from other people! FRADULENCE!!!! You are SICK man. Very sick indeed. Not to mention completely obvious in your attempt to ellicit Divinity secrets. You're antics are puerile. And I suspect you smell like cheese.


Secret Fortune Someone has been sticking your toothbrush in the toilet. This is NOT a joke.


Luky Numbers: Pi

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I TOO can be ego centric and want to ask you a question that also plays into your ego, so


are you flattered that, even tho I don't really post as much anymore, this thread has to be hands down one of the most entertaining and witty ones i've seen in a while, i love your edge how does this make you feel?

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how did u get so smart?


WHAT kind of stupid question is THAT?! Like I'm gonna tell YOU. First of all, if I WERE going to tell someone it certainly wouldn't be YOU blondie, secondly, someone should smack you. In conclusion, I'm so smart 'cause the rest of you are so DUMB. And I'm a pirate-ninja. Now, go stick your head in the toilet bowl and flush. It's what you deserve.


Secret Fortune Dogs urinate on your stuff whgen you're not looking. Sneaky dogs.


Lucky Numbers: infinity...plus 1

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Why are so many girls so salty that I'm officially smarter than them.  Are you all on you rag or somethin'




I still suspect that you smell like cheese. And remember, George W. Bush was "officially" elected president. Now. Go set yourself on fire.



Secret Fortune When you're sleeping, bugs crawl into your mouth.


Lucky Number: 1984

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Will you be angry w/ IC on behalf of all women?



Will YOU be angry w/ Corky from "Life Goes On" on behalf of all retards?!

DAMN! Why does everyone expect my righteous anger to benefit THEM. You arrogant mofos! Go stick some rocks up your nose, but don't forget your helmet before you leave the house...window licker.



Secret Fortune Dinner last night: That wasn't chicken.


Lucky Number: 1234567

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