Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 that was beautiful mind And after the spanking, the oral sex! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Monty Python and the Holy Grail Do you know how to use that thing? Yes! The pointy end goes into the other man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 zorro...banderas talkin about his sword How do you have patience for people who claim they love America, but clearly can't stand Americans? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Damn, was just gonna put one from that movie. American President. Yes, I've heard! Kills men by the hundreds. And if he were here, he'd consume the English with fireballs from his eyes and bolts of lightning from his arse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 braveheart...mr wallace in keeping with the bolts and the lightning... a little inside joke with SiBob The only thing powerful enough to generate 1.21 gigowatts of electricity is a bolt of lightning! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 What did you say? A bolt of lightning! Heh. Back to the Future. Anyway... THE SIGN ON THE BACK OF THE CAR SAID "CRITTERS OF HOLLYWOOD! YOU DUMB FUCK!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 ha, thats one of your own movies..which i just saw again like 2 nights ago...jay sibob strike back ...now i gotta come up with another one... I bought a suit. You seen it. Now it's covered in mud. This town doesn't have a one hour cleaner so I had to buy a new suit, except the only store you could buy a new suit in has got the flu. Got that? The whole store got the flu so I had to get this in a second hand store. So it's either wear the leather jacket which I know you hate, or this. So I wore this ridiculous thing for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 My Cousin Vinny They can suck my pathetic little dick, and I'll dip my nuts in marinara sauce just so those fat bastards can get a taste of home while they're at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 boondock saints 'da fuck you wanna know, I did what I did... walking off that handball court dumping game after game to your fucking old man. can I tell you I could beat his ass carryin' a lawn chair in my left hand so yea I'm takin' mine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Knockaround Guys Why I got to be all that? I'll drive us both off a fuckin' cliff, you keep fuckin' with me. Then, what, it'd be two bitches in the sea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 bad boys / martin lawrence Now you wouldn't believe me if I told you, but I could run like the wind blows. From that day on, if I was ever going somewhere, I was running!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Forest Gump Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have more responsibility here than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, *saves lives*. I know deep down in places you dont talk about at parties, you don't want me on that wall, you *need* me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline! I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then question the manner in which I provide it. I prefer you said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand to post. Either way, I don't give a DAMN what you think you are entitled to! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 a few good men [/i]Ahh! My Balls! They're on fire!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Death to Smoochy I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as much as you deserve. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 lord of the rings Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll give it a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Send in the marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number was called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what do I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Good Will Hunting I tried to pick one out of this scene, but screw it, I'll just put the whole scene. Alright, where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both drink and find out who is right and who is dead. But it's so simple. All I have to do is divine from what I know of you. Are you the sort of the man who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy's? Now, a clever man would put it in his own goblet because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I am not a great fool so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known that I was not a great fool. You would have counted on it! So I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me. You've made your decision then? Not remotely! Because iocane comes from Australia, as everyone knows. And Australia is entirely peopled with criminals and criminals are used to have people not trust them as you are not trusted by me so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. Truly you have a dizzying intellect. Wait 'til I get going! Where was I? Australia. Yes, Australia! And you must have suspected that I would have known the powder's origin, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me. You're stalling, now. You'd like to think that, wouldn't you!? You've beaten my giant which means you are exceptionally strong, so you could have put the poison into your own goblet, trusting on your strength to save you so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you also bested my Spaniard, which means you must have studied and in studying you must have learned that man is mortal so you would have put the poison as far from yourself as possible so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me! You're trying to trick me into giving away something. It won't work. It *has* worked! You've given everything away, I know where the poison is! Then make your choice. I will! And I choose---what in the world can that be?! Where? I don't see anything. Well, I...I could have sworn I saw something. No matter... What's so funny? I-I'll tell you in a minute. First, let's drink! Me from my glass and you from yours. (both drink) You guessed wrong. You only *think* I guessed wrong, that's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha-ha, you fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous of which is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia", but only slightly less well known is *this*: "Never go in against a Sicilian, when *death* is on the line!". Ah-hahahaha! Ah-hahaha...............................(collapses). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ganny McVagflaps Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 I'm not 100%, or even 10% sure about this one at all, but methinks it's Good Will Hunting.... If I'm wrong, just skip my one, but if I'm right: Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Yours is Airplane!, but you skipped mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ganny McVagflaps Posted August 24, 2003 Share Posted August 24, 2003 Oooups...ya musta posted it while I was in the process of posting mine, sorry 'bout that. Anyways once again..... Alright, where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both drink and find out who is right and who is dead. But it's so simple. All I have to do is divine from what I know of you. Are you the sort of the man who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy's? Now, a clever man would put it in his own goblet because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I am not a great fool so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known that I was not a great fool. You would have counted on it! So I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me. You've made your decision then? Not remotely! Because iocane comes from Australia, as everyone knows. And Australia is entirely peopled with criminals and criminals are used to have people not trust them as you are not trusted by me so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. Truly you have a dizzying intellect. Wait 'til I get going! Where was I? Australia. Yes, Australia! And you must have suspected that I would have known the powder's origin, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me. You're stalling, now. You'd like to think that, wouldn't you!? You've beaten my giant which means you are exceptionally strong, so you could have put the poison into your own goblet, trusting on your strength to save you so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you also bested my Spaniard, which means you must have studied and in studying you must have learned that man is mortal so you would have put the poison as far from yourself as possible so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me! You're trying to trick me into giving away something. It won't work. It *has* worked! You've given everything away, I know where the poison is! Then make your choice. I will! And I choose---what in the world can that be?! Where? I don't see anything. Well, I...I could have sworn I saw something. No matter... What's so funny? I-I'll tell you in a minute. First, let's drink! Me from my glass and you from yours. (both drink) You guessed wrong. You only *think* I guessed wrong, that's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha-ha, you fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous of which is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia", but only slightly less well known is *this*: "Never go in against a Sicilian, when *death* is on the line!". Ah-hahahaha! Ah-hahaha...............................(collapses). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 princess bride We got this job on 65th and Third. This big freakin' ballbreaker of a job, right, and we got the area roped off so that some schmuck don't walk through there and take a wrecking ball between the eyes. All of a sudden this woman, you know with the big dark glasses and the Bloomingdale bags, she starts walking right through the ropes and I yell down at her, "Hey! You can't go there ya stupid bitch." And suddenly, this big steam fittin' bursts and this God damn crane crashes right down on her legs. And she's screaming, "My Legs! My Legs!" And I say, "No shit, your legs, you got a two-thousand-pound goddamn crane on you." Now you know that in an emergency situation you can get superhuman strength? I reach down and I lift this crane and was able to slide her out from under, and the doctors were able to save her legs. So the moral of this story is: don't walk where you're not supposed to walk because there may not be someone with superhuman strength to save your little ass. And don't do drugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 25th hour If I was a giant nasty alien bird in a department store, where would I be? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Bob Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 Evolution Did you want confession? Uh, maybe later, Father. Because where I'm going I'd just have to come right back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 end of days? not sure so not gonna post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted August 27, 2003 Share Posted August 27, 2003 that was City Slickers...come on ppl... That's not funny. A friend of mine once took a Chinese fighting muffin in the chest; they sent him home in four Ziploc bags. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Signal08 Posted September 22, 2003 Share Posted September 22, 2003 charlies angels... No, the clit is real. Its the female orgasm that's the myth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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