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Blargh - The Random Thread


The NZA

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I got a question, how come everybody else in the picture has either a buzzcut or like the whole marine flat top thing going on but you're all up there lookin' like Jason Priestly with your swept back 90210 hair?

 

I recall that pic was taken towards the end (after Haz-Mat), when we had time/were allowed to do stuff like that. By then, i was a lot less worried about demerits/push-ups. Trust me that the first few months, i had a military cut and no sideburns.

 

Man, I wish I was on my own computer right now so I could post a pic of Nick from back when he had totally homosexual hair...
It was beautful. Like faboi. Only, i never washed it.

 

Is there a firefighter code on personal appearance when on duty, Nick? things like jewelery, hair length, paleness, sunglasses, length of fingernails etc?

 

Oh yeah.

No goatees/beards cause it potentially interferes with the breathing apparatus, depends on the dept but most dont allow for long hair as far as i know, rank up enough and you can do as you please if you dont mind the shit youll catch for it.

Jewelry...not in academy, but again its dept by dept. Thing is, you really wanna wear nice rings and shit if either a) youre gonna get blood on them working rescure, or take them off constantly to wear gloves, or b) have any metals you wear potentially seared onto you in a fire? I dont even wear the :wolvy: necklace when im training.

 

Sunglasses you can do whatever, though i took a lotta shit years back for the transmetropolitan ones. Paleness is fine, but i advice you buy stock in Bullfrog when im on duty, cause i bathe in the shit.

 

PS

 

Livestock_apocalypse.jpg

 

That made my night.

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had this dream earlier today, i think i was guiding some friends around my old school. i was passing through the playground when night quickly fell, and what little light was afforded made me realize it'd suddenly gone Silent Hill 3.

I soon woke up, before even seeing anything really, but i heard shit and that was enough. Creeped me out a bit...anyway, let's not dwell on that, here's the cover to Nextwave # 11 in case you missed it.

 

nextwave11cx4.jpg

 

ps heres a confusing-ass norwegian keyboard.

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The metaphor is "As alike as two peas in a pod."

 

If Gizmo and Archimedes are gonna become 2 peas in a pod, it means they're gonna become alike.

 

I'm pretty sure you were going for the going to become best buddies angle... which'd prolly be sometihng like "as close as two fingers on a hand" or something.

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The metaphor is "As alike as two peas in a pod."

 

If Gizmo and Archimedes are gonna become 2 peas in a pod, it means they're gonna become alike.

 

I'm pretty sure you were going for the going to become best buddies angle... which'd prolly be sometihng like "as close as two fingers on a hand" or something.

 

True but some people use the saying "like two peas in a pod" which has come to mean best buds

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Apparently I spoke to this one before...

 

 

alex perez: hey girl

alex perez: no puedes dormir?

me: I'm nocternal

alex perez: lol

alex perez: ok

me: serious

alex perez: always been like that

alex perez: a what time you go to bed

alex perez: normally

me: 3am

alex perez: wow

alex perez: did the baby girl wake up few times during the nite?

me: she's up now

alex perez: wow

alex perez: it is good that u r nocturnal then

alex perez: do u have more pics of u?

me: profile

alex perez: what does nic stand for

me: ?????????

alex perez: super..something

alex perez: ???

me: eeyore

me: super = my love for superman

me: eeyore= my love for the winnie the pooh character eeyore

alex perez: i just understood that eyore is a character

alex perez: which one is it

alex perez: in winnie the poh

alex perez: lol

me: donkey

alex perez: super donkey

alex perez: lol

alex perez: nice

alex perez: what about the 69?

alex perez:

me: just a number

alex perez: a number that i like

me: I bet....

alex perez: as u would c in my nic as well

alex perez: lol

alex perez: u c we have already something in common

alex perez: lol

me: yeah

alex perez: r u a 69er ?

me: no

alex perez: arent u sexual at all?

me: yes in the privacy of my bed room

alex perez: oooh great

alex perez: fantastic

alex perez: did it happens to u that the first few months of pregnancy

alex perez: the hormones get all crazy

me:

alex perez: and sexually women get hornier than ever

alex perez: and that after labor exactly the contrary happens, that women dont want to fuck for a longgg time

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So you may've thought I was dojing a couple months ago when I said alana's best friend's sister's ex-boyfriend up & shot both his parents in the back of the head & buried them in a shallow grave on their property, but today he was involved in a rooftop protest for detainee access to educational programs & whatnot. No word yet on how stretched his arse is.

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SIDE EFFECTS:

This drug may cause joint pain, nausea, head-ache, or shortness

of breath. You may also experience muscle aches, rapid heartbeat, and ringing in the ears. If you feel faint, call your doctor. Do not consume alcohol whiletaking this pill; likewise, avoid red meat, shellfish, and vegetables. O.K. foods: flounder. Under no circumstances eat yak. Men can expect painfulurination while sitting, especially if the penis is caught between the toilet seat and the bowl. Projectile vomiting is common in thirty percent of users-sorry, fifty percent. If you undergo disorienting nausea accompanied by migraine and raspy breathing, double the dosage. Leg cramps are to be expected; one knee-buckler per day is normal. Bowel movements may become frequent-in fact, every ten minutes. If bowel movements become greater than twelve per hour, consult your doctor, or any doctor, or just anyone who will speak to you.

 

You may find yourself becoming lost or vague; this would be a good time to

write a screenplay. Do not pilot a plane, unless you are among the ten per cent

of users who experience "spontaneous test-pilot knowledge." If your hair begins

to smell like burning tires, move away from any buildings or populated areas, and apply tincture of iodine to the head until you no longer hear what could be taken for a "countdown." May cause stigmata in Mexicans. If a fungus starts to grow between your eyebrows, call the Guinness Book of World Records. May induce a tendency to compulsively repeat the phrase "no can do." This drug may cause visions of the Virgin Mary to appear in treetops. If this happens, open a souvenir shop.

 

There may be an overwhelming impulse to shout out during a Catholic Mass, "I'm gonna wop you wid da ugly stick!" You may feel a powerful sense of impending doom; this is because you are about to die. Men may experience impotence, but only during intercourse. Otherwise, a powerful erection will accompany your daily "walking-around time."

 

Do not take this product if you are uneasy with lockjaw. Do not be near a ringing telephone that works at 900 MHz or you will be very dead, very fast. We are assuming you have had chicken pox. You also may experience a growing dissatisfaction with life along with a deep sense of melancholy - join the club! Do not be concerned if you arouse a few ticks from a Geiger counter. You might want to get a one-month trial subscription to Extreme Fighting. The hook shape of the pill will often cause it to become caught in the larynx. To remove, jam a finger down your throat while a friend holds your nose to prevent the pill from lodging in a nasal passage. Then throw yourself stomach first on the back portion of a chair. The expulsion of air should eject the pill out of the mouth, unless it goes into a sinus cavity, or the brain.

 

WARNING:

 

This drug may shorten your intestines by twenty-one feet. Has been known to cause birth defects in the user retroactively. Passing in front of TV may cause the screen to moiré.

 

Women often feel a loss of libido, including a woo-octave lowering of the voice, an increase in ankle hair, and perhaps the lowering of a testicle. If this happens, women should write a detailed description of their last three sexual encounters and mail it to me, Steven, house Six, Fancyland house Park, York, SC. Or E-mail me at umm, well just come to the house

 

Discontinue use immediately if you feel that your teeth are receiving radio broadcasts.

 

You may experience "lumpy back" syndrome, but we are actively seeking a cure. Bloated fingertips on the heart-side hand are common. When finished with the dosage, be sure to allow plenty of "quiet time" in order to retrain the eye to move off stationary objects. Flotation devices at sea will become pointless, as the user of this drug will develop a stone-like body density; therefore, if thrown overboard, contact your doctor.

 

(This product may contain one or more of the following: bungee cord, plankton, rubber, crack cocaine, pork bladders, aromatic oils, gunpowder, corn husk, glue, bee pollen, dung, English muffin, poached eggs, ham, Hollandaise sauce, crushed saxophone reeds.)

 

Sensations of levitation are illusory, as is the sensation of having a "phantom" third arm. Users may experience certain inversions of language. Acceptable: "Hi, are how you?" Unacceptable: "The rain in Sprain slays blainly on the phsssst."

 

Twenty minutes after taking the pills, you will feel an insatiable craving to take another dose. AVOID THIS WITH ALL YOUR POWER. It is advisable to have a friend handcuff you to a large kitchen appliance, ESPECIALLY ONE THAT WILL NOT FIT THROUGH THE DOORWAY TO WHERE THE PILLS ARE. You should also be out of reach of any weapon-like utensil with which you could threaten friends or family,who should also be briefed to not give you the pills, no matter how much you sweet-talk them.

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